Staight and Narrow

I heard a quote once from J Golden Kimball that reads, "I may not have walked the straight and narrow, but I crossed it as often as I could." That is where the name of this blog comes from, and how I see myself now. I may not have been the best rule follower growing up, but I tried as best I can and I am trying even harder now. I think I'm staying closer to the path now, and I'm holding onto the rod, but sometimes I forget to hold on. This reference comes from the Book of Mormon, where a prophet named Lehi received a vision of a tree with delicious fruit The path of the tree was marked by a path with an iron rod. Lehi's son, Nephi, also had the vision and stated that the path was filled with a mist of darkness that clouded the path and that if the people clung to the rod they made it safely to the tree. The image shows an artist rendering of this vision. (For reference read 1 Nephi 8, 12, and 15--Lehi's vision is in chapter 8, Nephi's in 12 and the explanation in 15). My path may not have been straight and narrow, but hopefully from now on it can be.

Figuring out the "Why?"

Recently in my recovery group, I was posed the question to look at the why of what I am doing, not just the bad stuff, or the temptations, but the good stuff as well. Recovery isn't just about keeping the bad out but also about putting the good in. If I can figure out why I like something, then it is helping to keep me in recovery. Sometimes it takes a lot of work to figure out, but in the end it is worth it.

In general, I am a curious person. I like to know how things work and why they work (maybe that's why I am studying engineering). Figuring out the why has helped to curb some of that curiosity, especially the curiosity that would get me into trouble. Sometimes figuring out why and how a plane flies is easier than figuring out why I am curious, but in the end it is worth it. I can keep myself safe, all in the while satisfying that curiosity.

One Thing I've Learned

If there is one thing I've learned recently, it is that the phrase, "Victimless Crime," and "I'm not hurting anyone" are both FALSE. If anything you are hurting yourself. Above all it hurts God and your partner, if you have one.

Forgive me for using a somewhat inappropriate picture, but I think it does the job well. Addiction hurts our family, whether it is a sex, drugs, food, or any other addiction. Now I'm not saying that it is easy to remember that our addictions don't affect others, because it is definitely not!

From the non-profit organization Fight the New Drug's website, I read the following in the section Porn Hurts Your Partner:

"...emotional pain can run much deeper than having a bad time in bed. Since women in our culture typically expect their intimate relationships to be built on trust, respect, honesty, and love, when a woman learns that her partner is using porn—which typically glorifies the opposite: disrespect, abuse, aggression, and infidelity—it can not only damage the trust she has in her partner, but also shake the foundation of everything she believed about her relationship."

Partners, especially women, find it very difficult to deal with the disclosure of porn usage; it is much worse to not tell them though, and to have them find out another way!

Remember that addiction is not a "victimless crime" and that we do hurt other people by using our addiction.

Create

I have been thinking a lot about creating and creativity recently. When I was younger I thought that I wasn't creative, and sometimes still today those thoughts creep in. President Dieter F. Uchtdorf of the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints recently gave a talk on creation. The Church afterward created a YouTube video called Create. You can click on the link or push play on the video on this post. One of my favorite lines says that if we are all sons and daughters of the most creative being in the world, then why would we not also be creative! Our minds and bodies were meant to create, and no one can stop you and me from creating the next big thing! So go out there and be creative! It may not start out big, but it will continue to grow and those creative juices will continue to flow and before you know it you've created something masterful!